if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket
you are one of the great thinkers of our time
being 20+ on tumblr
Being 30+ on Tumblr
I’ve been waiting for this.
i fell in love with him like ketchup falls out of a bottle: slowly, and then all at once.
oh my god you managed to one up john green.
People mistake ovulation and menstruation to be the same thing when in fact they aren’t
Ovulation is when the eggs are saying “hello friends I am here”
And menstuation is when the eggs are saying “goodbye friends I am gone”
Ovulation is when the eggs are saying, “WOO PARTY GET MONEY FUCK BITCHES!”
Menstruation is when the eggs are saying, “YOU DON’T WANT ME? WHAT? STUPID BITCH. FINE. WHATEVER. I DON’T NEED YOU.”
I will reblog this every time!
another “yes, keep petting human” gif.